conversations at zuma continued.

I wrote this yesterday. Dec 24th. Because I couldn't stop thinking about her. HAHAHA.

Christmas has arrived this year somewhat unexpectedly. Unfortunately I think age speeds time up which really just means we get older faster than anyone would ever expect.

My conversation at Zuma yesterday went something like this:
-- So you're what 29, how~
-- (cuts in) Err. I'm 30.
-- (genuine surprise/shock) You're 30!!
-- (frowns slightly) Um. Yes? Didn't you~
-- (cuts in) How old's TY?
-- 31. 32 soon.
-- 31!! Shit!!!
-- WHAT??!
-- I dunno. I mean. Don't take this the wrong way but... you don't have a plan for your life... I mean...

I watched her trying to explain what she was trying to say, watched as she tried to word how TY's life - and hence also my own - was something she could not fathom or understand. I've seen it many times before. I don't know what TY's life plans are, I don't know what she believes in, and whether or not she ever gets scared or worried about her life.

-- It's one of the things I couldn't stand about TY. The fact that she never knew when her next job is, when her next paycheck is coming in, never knew what was going to happen next.

I think my heart sunk at this point. If she couldn't stand this with TY, then she definitely wouldn't be able to stand it with me because I'm even more spontaneous and impulsive than TY even if I'm a little less emotionally-crazy/frazzled.

So anyway, I gave her my God talk. How I know God will take care of me. How I know He loves me so much that things will come up in my life that are totally unexpected. How the things that she works hard to prepare for are not things I worry about. Life insurance, pensions, blah blah, God will take care of all that for me. That's not to say I can be complacent, but it sure as hell means I have a lot less to worry about. After all, when the boat gets to the harbour, it will become straight right.

But I could see she remained unconvinced. As well I would expect. Because it's not fair. How is it that she has to slave away at a job she doesn't like and then there are people like us who can freelance, who when we have no job, can sit and do nothing, lie in bed all day, watch Friends all day... and we're allowed to get away with it. It's not fair, is it.

The conclusion of those conversations at Zuma? Open-ended. She asked me to ask God something but then wouldn't tell me what she wanted to ask *eyes roll* I told her to ask Him herself and she wondered out loud whether non-Christians can ask God things to which I chuckled a little and said, Of course you can!! Anyone can!!! Silly!

I hope God will answer her question. Or maybe He already has. I don't know :)

God bless.