self-hatred and violence.

It's the weirdest feeling ever when someone you don't know very well can see right through you to the other side. The immediate thought that runs through my head is should I deny this, or should I just never see this person again?! But me being me, I just frowned slightly, laughed (uncomfortably) slightly, and then told him that he had just made the truest assessment of me that I had ever heard. And then followed that up with I think we should stop hanging out.

The funny/stupid thing is, of course, that we actually very very rarely "hang out".

Bizarrely enough, I feel very naked when I talk to him. It's so weird. I never thought people could see that there's something amiss about me - well, not unless I actually let them see it. But nope. He can see right through me. I hope there aren't too many people like him out there in the big wide world. It really is very freaky.

Hmm.

The other funny thing is that I - who never usually ask questions - ask him a lot of questions. To the point where he actually commented that he hadn't spoken this much in a very long time. Hahaha. That made me laugh.

I wish I had better memory, so that I can mull over the interesting conversation we had the other night a little more. But no. The only thing that seems to run through my head over and over... is the fact that he can see right through me.

Narcissist. Some things never change.

God bless.