It takes an earthquake.

Magnitude 8.8 (or 8.9?) - 8000 times stronger than the one that devastated Christchurch a few weeks ago - shook Japan yesterday afternoon. As always, I get my news from Twitter - friend in Japan tweeted "HOLY EARTHQUAKE" and then the reports from BBC's twitter started rolling through. And then, the tsunami hit, and parts of Japan were absolutely devastated.

And then the tsunami warnings and alerts went around the world - Japan, Russia, Philippines, Taiwan, Hawaii, the West Coast of the Americas - Oregon, California, Chile... And then the news came that the tsunami - perhaps much weakened - would reach the shores of Guangdong province. Which is where Hong Kong is.

The weirdly odd thing about life - for me, at least - is that I get so caught up in my own life and in self-pity that all priorities and things are skewed. And of course, I don't realise it. I know that I complain a lot more - I realise that - but I don't see the mud that is made of self-pity that I love wallowing in so very much. Not until a devastating earthquake hits a beautiful country, and we see live footage of water devastating everything in its path.

And yesterday, on that stupid cover shoot, everything just seemed so trivial. So. Trivial.

I have no clue when God will open up a door for me to leave this job that I am at now. I love this job, I love the new things that I am learning every day, yet at the same time, my work seems so trivial. TCW always says that I am where I am for a reason. He's said that from the day that I told him that I was offered this job... And he says it every time I call him (twice haha) when I'm upset because I'm not on a filmset somewhere. Steven Sodobergh. James Bond. Blah blah blah. Perhaps he really believes it. But I also know that he says it because it's the only thing that would make me feel better...

Right. No more self-pity. No more earthquakes to open my eyes to this ridiculous waste of time (I'd much rather procrastinate - or sleep or read a book or... yeah - than wallow thank you very much)

God bless Japan.