Day-off-less

I just had a really good bowl of cereal. I love Shanghai. I can buy practically anything I want there. I wonder if anyone will be going to Shanghai anytime soon. I desperately wish I had more cereal. Ack.

Tim will be holding his second show tomorrow at 9pm. And I'm going to miss it because I'm still stuck in China. I was so gonna fly back for it, then I could go to the wedding on Saturday too. Hahaha. I'm such a slacker. But no. Meeting on Saturday. I can't even go to Shanghai as originally planned. This industry sucks! And yet I love it.

My head is whirling now with dreams. My ex told me that I dream too much, that I have to put my head back into this world, that I cannot dream my life away. I never realized it, didn't listen, and now I am beginning to understand it. I think too much about the future. About what might happen. About things that could have happened if i had done something about it when I first started to think about it. But I just live in my own head and think and think and think... and believe some miracle is gonna happen... and of course, nothing happens. It's like the fable/parable/myth/legend/story with a moral: the farmer who fell asleep under a tree and a rabbit ran past and he caught it. And then for the rest of his days, he waited under the tree for another rabbit. That's me - the farmer, not the rabbit.

I could do this, I could do that. This opportunity might arise, that chance might come. I could work out a great partnership (work-wise) with this person, I could really do with training under that person... I could work in this industry or that industry, or even both. I could live in this city or that city... or fly from one to the other. All these thoughts. How many of them will come true? Are all these things God's plan for me... or is it Satan trying to lead me even further away from God than I already am?

Reminds me - we passed by a church here a couple days ago. It was Monday I think. I was so amazed and so touched. I wish I could go but I'm working Sundays from 6am to... late. Anyhoo. We'll see. It's basically just a house, but there are signs that say "Hengdian Church" and then another sign with an arrow that points to "Jesus' home" :) I love it.

I can't access any of the Yahoo news pages about Hong Kong. I wish I could find out what was going on there! Aie.

Anyhoo. I have to shower and sleep. Though it might seem quite early (not even 8pm!) I can assure you I will pass out and not wake up until tomorrow morning. Maybe I won't wake up until next week.... hahahahaha I wish.

God bless. James babe... happy birthday for tomorrow...