Spain becomes the third nation.

This was what I had wanted to blog about last night when I was at work and then rudely interrupted (by my boss who wanted to go home). As an aside, it's funny how I actually have time to write/blog when I'm not even sleeping properly. It's not even 10am and I woke up for some strange reason, my body is aching all over and I can't get back to sleep. Or well, maybe it's because I haven't really tried. But I hate sleeping and waking every so often because to me, that's just bad sleep, and not worth it.

I read in the news yesterday that Spain has become the third nation to allow gay people to get married, and the second to allow gay people to adopt. The Netherlands, Belgium and Spain. Canada will too, if the bill passes some House or other - but though Canada has always supported gay marriage, you never know what the government is up to and whether or not it will pass. I heard some time ago that England was going to change the rule, and Elton John had proposed to David and that they were gonna get married in December this year. Hm.

Such controversy over this issue. It's so odd. What strikes me as really interesting is that Spain is a predominantly Roman Catholic country - I guess they must have a lax form of the Catholicism, no?

It's weird for me to read these reports and then feel joy for these countries and the freedom it means for the gay people there. I have to say that being gay is not an easy thing. However, the immediately conflict that comes after feeling joy is quite depressing - the fact that my religion supposedly opposes anything gay... I don't really think my attitude has changed (though I best keep that from most people) - I still don't think loving someone of the same sex is wrong. How can love be wrong? Promiscuity is wrong, and for some reason gay people - especially men - can be so much more promiscuious... but that's a stereotype too.

There are so many issues that I have yet to clear up and I have no way of knowing when I will ever fully let go of my principles and take God's to be my own. Honestly, if Christians won't allow gay unions/gay marriage, then why are there female teachers, why are there female leaders of the church? It's odd how some of these things become accepted and others aren't. Perhaps in another 100 years time, being gay will have been totally accepted and then there will be some other debate about some other thing.

I wish there were answers, and I wish there was someone who I could have this debate with. But no. The people in my church that I know just don't like to think about it.

I still remember my promise to the church before I got baptized - no more relationships with girls. But it doesn't mean I think it's wrong, and to be honest, can't I just have a platonic relationship with a girl? I'm not straying, I haven't fallen for a girl, but for some strange reason, this issue has came back to haunt me... because I really don't see what's wrong with it. Maybe I'm gonna get kicked out of the church. Can they revoke my having been baptized into the church?!

Enough crap. I've ranted long enough and probably after I go back to bed and get up again, I won't believe I've written all that.

God bless.